


Confession

by MoonShadows



Category: Avengers (Comics), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:54:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25950961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonShadows/pseuds/MoonShadows
Summary: Recovering Bucky struggles with a confession to Reader. Set during a time when Bucky would have been happy as one of the Avengers and found love in an ordinary person.A short glimpse into a moment in time.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Reader, James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader
Kudos: 54





	Confession

The pounding bass of the music from Tony's party was muffled by the glass door closing behind her. She downed her flute of champagne before taking a deep breath, finally getting some fresh air on the empty balcony for the first time that evening. She tugged at her strapless gown, cursing Carol "I know fashion" Danvers for convincing her to wear the emerald silk number with a slit that was almost offensively high up her thigh.

A still shadow caught her eye, the broad shoulders and bowed head of a slumped, seated figure was immediately recognizable. Her heels clicked softly as she approached the patio set, her concern growing when the target of her attention didn't look up.

"I wondered where you had slipped off to, Buck-"

Her breath was gently, but forcefully, knocked out of her when she felt his dense arms come around her waist, his face buried in her navel. Bucky squeezed her tightly, almost desperately.

She was stunned. He had never touched her before. 

_What do I do?_

She fumbled for a second, gingerly setting her empty champagne flute on a side table before fluttering her hands around Bucky, unsure of where to touch him. 

"Buck?" She asked, eventually placing her hands lightly on his shoulders. "What's wrong?"

No answer. He only buried his face into her soft belly further, his long brown hair offering the sweet scent of clean shampoo.

She remembered back to when they first started hanging out. From the moment he first approached her at her circulation desk at the library to ask for a book, she was smitten. His beautiful eyes, shy voice and gorgeous face had her hook, line and sinker, and they became fast friends.

After about a year of late-night book chats, walking him through the online library catalog, teaching him how to use a smart phone and texting him movie recommendations, he had swept her up in his amazing life of Avengering. She left her lonely life for a friendship with Steve Rogers. Her lovely library received a generous grant from Tony to "keep the resources alive for the kids" and now she was rubbing elbows with the New York Elite at one of Tony's famous parties. 

She remembered back to the first time Bucky opened up to her, quietly confessing he hated his arm, worried he would scare her with what it could do. She reassured him, while they were having ice cream, that he could never scare her. He had smiled gently and called her a good friend, making her heart wince silently. 

For months after, he had started opening his life to her to the point of her now being housemates with Carol, gym buddies with Sam, and fellow dinner gossiper with Nat and Bruce. 

He made her boring life extraordinary, and if all he wanted was a friend, then she would be there for him. 

"Bucky?" 

Still, no answer. She gently stroked his hair, unsure of how to continue. What if this is goodbye? What if he finally realized her ordinary, mundane life was too beneath his extraordinary ability? 

"Remember when I said you could never scare me?"

Bucky inhaled sharply at her words, but still didn't answer.

"You're scaring me now." 

He released her immediately, gently pushing her away and standing to retreat back from her. 

He stared at her with horror in his eyes, terrified he had hurt her. He shook his head, unable to speak.

This is how it went for a lot of the time they were together. She'd be patient with his struggle to express himself, understanding the effort it took to undo what Hydra did to him. She'd coax him with leading questions to eventually get to whatever point he tried to make.

"Are you okay?"

Bucky thought for a moment and gave a noncommittal shake of his head.

She sat down on a padded patio lounger, trying to figure out what to ask to get him to answer.

"Is it something I did? Said?"

Bucky brought his flesh and metal hand up to his face and huffed with frustration at himself for not being able to form his words. He came toward her now, kneeling down and grabbing her hands in his. He shook his head in answer to her question and dropped his forehead to rest on their hands. 

"Is it something you're thinking about now and can't say?"

Bucky shook his head no. "Before." He said painfully.

"Something you were thinking about before? What were you thinking about?"

"You." 

That caught her off guard. "Me? What about me?"

Bucky shook his head no again and stood up abruptly, taking a few steps back from her again. "Don't wanna scare you." He huffed again and turned to look out from the balcony onto the busy street. 

"You'll only scare me if you say we're not friends anymore." She stood and marched over to him. "C'mon. It's me. You can tell me anything." She slunk her body between him and the balcony to force him to look at her. "What were you thinking about?"

His pained face looked down at her. He couldn't seem to get away from her inquisitive, lovely eyes. He realized he didn't want to. 

"Kissing you."

He couldn't look at her then, couldn't bear the disgust that's bound to cross her face. He escaped the warming comfort she always exuded and sat back down on the lounger, face buried in his hands. 

He heard her heels click as she came to stand in front of him. She gently brought his hands back around her waist and cradled his head to her navel again.

"I've thought about kissing you, too." 

Bucky looked up at her then, his hands slowly coming to cradle her hips. He shook his head in disbelief, ready to dismiss her. "I'm a monster." He whispered, tears brimming in his eyes.

It was her time to shake her head, tears almost spilling over, too. "You're beautiful." She said, bringing her hands to his gorgeous, pained face.

And he was. His kindness, his gentle consideration when they were together, his rare smile and his smooth voice were all she needed to feel safe and seen. 

She bent down and kissed him on the forehead. 

"Do I have this all wrong?" She whispered, slowly straightening. "Did I make all this up in my head? You're so special to me, I don't know how-"

Bucky cut her off by standing and kissing her fiercely. He wrapped her up in his arms, her softness and warmth a pleasure he never thought he deserved. After savoring the sweet taste of her lips, he broke the kiss.

"Really love you." He sputtered with a boyish charm, too happy to regret the moment.

She beamed at him, tucking a stray hair behind his ear. "I really love you, too, Buck."

They kissed again, enjoying each other, unbothered by their worries and the noise from the street. They held each other under the moonlight, and as the night grew on, she convinced Bucky to come back to her room and talk about where they are, where they're going and how they'd get there. 


End file.
